Having a Me Moment

My youngest is into transit — it doesn’t matter which kind — light rail, water taxi, metro/subway, train — he studies them (thanks to the internet) and enjoys learning all the ins and outs, including their layouts, how to navigate/makes transfers, payment accepted, hours of operation, etc. To most, that might seem boring. To him, it brings him to life.

We decided to go east for Spring Break. My youngest was the navigator as we used mass transit for most of our travel to get around. We took a light rail from the airport, then transferred to a metro line. We/He learned things as we went — what was running on time or delayed, payment challenges (for those who ride transit and have struggled with a ticket kiosk, you know what I’m referring to), poorly marked transfers (how in the world do we get to the green line, I only see an exit?), and entering the metro on the wrong side of the platform (oh no, is that the train we want to be on over there?).

My favorite was when we entered the DC metro for the first time. Clearly, this is what my son had been waiting for. He had the biggest smile on his face that expressed immense joy. “You look happy,” I said. “Mom,” my son replied with a smile even bigger, “This is one of the best transit systems in the US, even in the world. I’m having a me moment.” I just watched him as he took it all in. Side note: for those that aren’t familiar with kids on the autism spectrum like my son is, you may not know that one of their super powers is knowing what they like/are interested in/their passion. It is super inspiring to see.

While my son was loving our journey for the most part, he’d get upset with himself anytime a mistake happened. He prides himself of his knowledge and likes being thought of as ‘the guy that doesn’t need no stinking map’ (his grandfather coined that phrase for my son after my son told his grandparents he knew the full layout of an amusement park they’d taken he and his brother to and weren’t sure how to navigate without a map. He told them “we don’t need no stinking map. I know how to navigate this place!” And he did.😊).

I had to remind my son that mistakes happening is how we learn, and yes, it can be frustrating and doesn’t feel great, but we’re better for it, when we take something away we’ll do differently. He understood but didn’t like it.😊

My son having his ‘Me Moment’ stayed with me. How fortunate we are as parents when we see our child(ren) come to life —literally seeing their dream coming true before your eyes. It’s rare. Very rare. And, while at the time I don’t think I realized it, I (likely along with my husband) were having a ‘me moment’ too as parents witnessing this/experiencing this with our son.

What is your child passionate about? What ‘Me Moments’ have you witnessed/experienced?

How Am I Doing as a Mother?

When you think about what kind of mother you are, what comes to mind?

I want my children to see me as someone who deeply loves and cares about their well-being, but am also tasked with teaching them things and keeping them safe. My job isn’t to give them what they want, when they want it, or remove all the obstacles life throws their way, or to always be pleasant. My job is to teach them to navigate these obstacles, appreciate hard work and the rewards of your labor, and how to treat others in a way you feel good about.

Being a parent is challenging. You learn as you go. You learn from the modeling of your own parents and others you respect. It’s ever changing with endless opportunities to learn something new.

When my children were younger and Mother’s Day rolled around, I simply wanted a break. I wanted time to myself, to relax and rest. As my children age, I view Mother’s Day as an opportunity for me to check-in with myself and see if I am being the mother I want to be. Am I teaching my children the things I want to? Am I modeling the behavior I want them to replicate?

I love that people honor their moms on Mother’s Day, and while I’m sure I’ll enjoy a good meal with my family, I’m more interested in how I navigate my role as a parent. How I improve. How I mother my boys in a way I’m proud of and satisfied with after my children are off on their own.

What does Mother’s Day mean to you? How do you celebrate the occasion?