Category Archives: Win

Fight On!

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Does your child play a sport?

Our Friday evenings are filled with football games. Our oldest plays mostly center and on the offensive line for his team. Going to his games is a mix of nostalgia (my high school experience going to games), nerves (still getting to know parents of the other players), and stress (for my son and the other players safety, how the game will go, etc.).

When I was in high school, our team was good. It was fun to see them win, it stung when they lost, but socializing with friends was the best part. Fast forward to now, my son’s team did well enough to win their division last year (moving them up), and now getting pummeled every game this year — so painful. Yet, while defeat doesn’t feel good, and can shake your confidence, the kids seem to be taking it in stride, and the school community more focused on supporting the players and just being happy to be together.

My son’s coach’s motto is “fight on!” It’s been the motto of the team for many years. And while it’s focused on the game of football it certainly applies to life. Keep going. Get back up. Try again. Keep fighting. Fight on!

My son’s team is being put to the test this year. Continued losses make it hard to get back up, but they support each other, want to get the best out of each other, and show each other they have given it their all. It might not be reflected in the final score of the game, but in their resilience in the face of defeat these kids are learning, they’re winning.

How does your child handle defeat? What positive impact comes from it?

We will be celebrating an older family member’s milestone birthday next week, so I will be off, but back the following.

Going for the Win

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Do you get nervous before performing — running a race, speaking or singing in public, etc.?

My oldest started a new sport that runs through winter. He went in with the mindset he wanted to take advantage of the conditioning and practice as a good way to stay in shape. He has decided that he will give competition a try. He is nervous, and knows he has much to learn to get good at this sport.

I picked him up following practice one day and he shared he was going to compete. The tone of his voice indicated he believed he’d lose, and the loss would be painful. I attempted to get him to see it from another point of view. “What level would you say you’re on for this sport?” I asked. “Zero,” he replied. I laughed, “I’d say you’re at least at a 1.” I paused before continuing, “You are still very new at wrestling. You may get pinned very quickly, but winning for you, at this point, is learning something new from the match that you can apply going forward. That’s your win. And if you agree with that, there’s no way you can lose.” He sat and thought about what I said, and nodded as if he understood.

Trying new things is hard, and scary. But the growth and insight we gain around our abilities and what’s possible is the reward. Losing never feels good, but what if you grow and become better. Isn’t that a win? I think so, and hope my son does too.

How are you helping your child find the wins in new situations?