Category Archives: Adventure

Never Go It Alone

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I was reminded of this saying when my oldest let me know he was hiking over the long weekend. It’s a normal thing for him to do in his free time. I asked, “who are you hiking with?” Knowing he has various friends he goes on these outings with. “No one,” he replied. Gulp.

I’ve read too many stories of people hiking alone, many very experienced, who have some mishap and end up injured, and too often, dead. My worried brain went into overdrive. My son is an adult and can do as he pleases, but his frontal cortex isn’t fully formed and this decision reminded me of where his brain is in its development.

I stressed that he should always go with someone. He countered that he went on a busy trail with tons of people around. I told him, that if anything happened to him I couldn’t bear it, and then I told him I had my PhD in worrying. Doesn’t every parent? My son responded with the “ha ha” bubble. 🤷‍♀️

I shared this news with my husband and we agreed we’d talk to our son again and stress the importance of not going alone.

In life, it’s easy to go it alone — when you don’t have others who want to join in, you just want to do something by yourself, and/or you think you can (or should) do something on your own. Sometimes you have to go alone — to school, work, or an appointment. Most times, the risk is low. But going alone has its risks — like when you hike a tall peak by yourself or when you take on too much (project, work, life) and struggle or fail.

Growing up is trial by error. As parents we try to arm our kids with knowledge to make decisions that will keep them safe and allow them to lead fulfilling lives. I hope we’ve done that for our boys. Now if I could just speed up my oldest’s frontal cortex to be fully formed. 🤣

When has worry overtaken you? How are you helping your child to be safe when they want to go it alone?

Through a Child’s Eyes

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You see things anew through your child, right?

I know I did. Particularly when they were young and experiencing things for the first time. Seeing animals at the zoo, riding on a merry-go-round, swimming! They were all new to the kids and met with great interest.

My kids are still getting me to see things in a new light. We have taken the boys on sightseeing trips to major US landmarks over the years. Our goal was to not only educate our sons, but show them how much variety (in the ways cities look and feel, how people get around, the weather, nature, and more) there is in our country.

One trip we were fortunate enough to get a tour guide who had his PhD in the history of the city we were in and he opened our eyes to things an average tourist (which is squarely where we would put ourselves) wouldn’t know. We loved it!

My youngest also loves history and geography and studies it without any prompting. He wanted to make a return trip over his Spring Break to two major cities we’d visited prior. My initial reaction was okay, but what are we going to do the whole time we’re there since we’ve already done most everything? Of course, I shouldn’t have underestimated my son.

He had places mapped out he wanted to go. Much like our tour with the PhD guide, our son was showing us things anew — a place where George Washington gave a speech and people were so inspired they took the crowns of the top of the posts of a fence nearby and melted them down to make cannons as part of the American Revolution. The fence still stands with a plaque you could easily walk past and never realize you just walked past something with historic relevance. He had us find where molasses spilled and killed many people prior to better safety laws being in place. The list goes on one on. We didn’t visit one traditional tourist site but explored each city in much more fulfilling way. I left each place feeling like I better knew it. I couldn’t have done that without my son’s own curiosity..

What has your child helped you see anew?

Second Class

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When have you felt ordinary?

For most of us it’s a majority of the time, but there are those occasions where you feel special — an upgrade at a hotel, priority lane access at an airport (or perhaps amusement park), or flying first class.

I did some travel during a Spring Break week and had many families on my flight as my destination wasn’t far from a popular amusement park. A young boy, probably 5 or so, was walking down the aisle with his mom. She was directing him to aisle 19. He asked if they were sitting in first class. He was already in the coach section when he asked this question. His mom said, “no, those are the seats at the front of the plane.” He wasn’t sure where the front of the plane was and asked if the seats were the furthest seats in the back of the plane. His mom laughed and asked if he’d remembered the larger seats they had already passed. He then asked, “are we second class?” Many of us laughed. Someone said, “it feels like it, right?” And another commented, “at least we’re not third.” 😂

We don’t often experience situations where we’re made to feel special, but even if you’re not flying first class, the fact that we can afford to be on a plane and go somewhere (for whatever reason) is pretty special.

For those on Spring Break, enjoy your adventure. I’ll be off next week experiencing our final school Spring Break and back towards the end of the month.

Off They Go

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When my boys were young we came across the book Off We Go to Mexico by Laurie Krebs, a fun book taking the reader through some of the wonders of Mexico. It starts with, “Off we go, off we go, off we go to Mexico.” The kids loved the repetitiveness of ‘off we go,’ and we applied it freely for any adventure we were going to have — ‘off we go, off we go, off we go to…the park, on a walk, or the zoo’ — you get the drift. Everyone loved the silliness of it, and it did make our journey feel more like a try adventure when the sing-song intro of ‘off we go’ got us started.

We took a trip in eastern Canada via rail. Our youngest planned logistics for our trip, with cities we’d visit, days we’d stay, and ideas for things to do including visiting family, seeing some sites, and building in ‘free time’ for everyone to be able to do what they wanted including relaxing or doing something on your own.

Our youngest really wanted to explore the metro system of one of the cities we visited by himself. He’d previously had done this without issue so we allowed him to go off and do it again with parameters — keeping us posted, updating us on his whereabouts, and when he’d be back. He went off on his adventure but shared he was coming back to the hotel earlier than we expected. “Everything okay?,” I asked. “Yes,” he replied. “Did something happen?” I asked. “No,” he shared, “I just got anxious and scared and bored.” His awareness of his own feelings always blows me away. “Okay,” I said, “you sure you’re okay? You can come meet us?” He declined and said he’d see us back at the hotel.

We talked at dinner about his day. He shared where he’d gone, and the routes he hadn’t. “Are you disappointed you didn’t go everywhere you wanted?” and he said, “I can do it when I come back.” We have no plans as a family to go there again, but my son does. I loved he can visualize himself getting back there.

I’m so proud of my son and his desire to break out on his own, and find his own adventures. I’m so grateful I’ve been able to not let my fears of letting him g(r)ow hold him back (not always easy). The words keep running through my mind every time he decides a new adventure (local or away) he plans to take. Off he goes, off he goes, off he goes to…

What adventures are you and your kid(s) having? Any books that your kid(s) haven’t grown out of?