Tag Archives: Mother

Magical Moments

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Magic moments are different for everyone. Some of mine — pausing at a BBQ and taking in all the friends, family, and community surrounding you; playing with the kids outside at twilight while they giggle at seeing fireflies; camping and seeing your family across the campfire as they roast marshmallows. It’s those times that you know are special and will stay with you.

My oldest agreed to go to admitted student day at the local college. I took him now knowing what to expect. He too, didn’t go in with any expectations. As the day progressed, we both realized how special it was. I was blown away at what the school offered its students—academically, recreationally, and community-wise; my son was surprised that he could actually envision himself there. It far exceeded our expectations.

My son suggested we get something to eat as we neared the end of the day. He was animated and wanting to talk. He has to make some big decisions soon (based on deadlines). Instead of trying to steer him any direction I just stopped and soaked in the moment — sitting with my son after a magical day on the cusp of what he does and where he goes next.

We talked the following night — I had to get on a plane to travel for work and was away from home. When we FaceTimed, he shared about his day. When he was done I told him the previous day had been special for me. He said, “me too, Mom.” Don’t know if it gets any better than that.

What magic moments have you and your child experienced?

Helping a Mother in Need

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When was the last time you did a random act of kindness?

My oldest son needed to get a new identification. After weeks of waiting, and thinking I had everything we needed for the appointment, we headed out to the office. We were met easily by a waiting clerk. Awesome, I thought. I gave them the paperwork. Everything was there. This is good, my optimism for this being the shortest appointment ever was growing. Then they asked for payment. No cash. No credit cards. Only a check would be expected. How could I forget to bring a check?, I thought. My mind started racing. I couldn’t just run to the car, my checkbook wasn’t there. If I went back to the house, I’d lose my place and have to reschedule the appointment again. Dread started sinking in.

Then the most amazing thing happened, a woman working with the clerk next to mine saw what was unfolding and offered to help. “I’ll give you a check. You can just Venmo or PayPal me.” I’ve never been so grateful. “Are you sure you don’t mind?,” I asked. “Not at all,” she said, “I’ve actually been looking for an opportunity to help someone else. The same thing happened to me when I was at a grocery store and the bill was over $400. I couldn’t believe someone would help me in that way and having been wanting to pay it forward ever sense. This makes me feel good.” I used her check to complete the transaction and transferred the owed funds noting in the notes “helping a mother in need.”

We all have had moments when we need help. We left house without diapers, or need someone to hold the baby while we handle another crisis, or ask someone to momentarily watch one child while we chase after another. There are always opportunities to help. This woman was a godsend and truly helped a mother in need. Now I’m on the lookout for who I can help, and pay forward her kindness.

How has someone else helped you in a time of need? How have you helped another parent in need?

How Am I Doing as a Mother?

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When you think about what kind of mother you are, what comes to mind?

I want my children to see me as someone who deeply loves and cares about their well-being, but am also tasked with teaching them things and keeping them safe. My job isn’t to give them what they want, when they want it, or remove all the obstacles life throws their way, or to always be pleasant. My job is to teach them to navigate these obstacles, appreciate hard work and the rewards of your labor, and how to treat others in a way you feel good about.

Being a parent is challenging. You learn as you go. You learn from the modeling of your own parents and others you respect. It’s ever changing with endless opportunities to learn something new.

When my children were younger and Mother’s Day rolled around, I simply wanted a break. I wanted time to myself, to relax and rest. As my children age, I view Mother’s Day as an opportunity for me to check-in with myself and see if I am being the mother I want to be. Am I teaching my children the things I want to? Am I modeling the behavior I want them to replicate?

I love that people honor their moms on Mother’s Day, and while I’m sure I’ll enjoy a good meal with my family, I’m more interested in how I navigate my role as a parent. How I improve. How I mother my boys in a way I’m proud of and satisfied with after my children are off on their own.

What does Mother’s Day mean to you? How do you celebrate the occasion?

On Mother’s Day

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How will you celebrate Mother’s Day today? With flowers? A card? Or a nice meal out?

On Mother’s Day I’ll look forward to sleeping in, having breakfast in bed, and seeing my children smile as they hand me their handmade gifts. While eating my breakfast, once my children have left the room to continue with their play, I’ll think about how grateful I am to have the opportunity to raise them. I’ll think about what I’m most proud of teaching them so far, and wisdom I still want to impart. I’ll think about the journey I am on, and  all the support I have from my husband, other moms—old and new, family and friends. I’ll think about the energy I need to be the mom that I want to be, and remind myself to continue to seek ways to get the recharge I need. I’ll think about my children’s smiling faces and the joy they bring me every day. I’ll think about how quickly they are growing and allow myself a moment to think I’ll still have many more Mother’s Days like this, when I know these will be very limited.  Even though my boys are seven and five, I’m still amazed I gave birth to these wonderful creatures and that I’m a mom, their mom.

Mother’s Day may have started to honor mothers everywhere, but I see it as a day for me to rest and reflect on how blessed I am. No one has to honor me, the honor of being their mother is all mine.

Happy Mother’s Day.