Category Archives: Planning

Pay Day

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What questions come up in your family about money?

When our kids were young, my husband and I agreed we wanted to teach our kids about money, saving, investing, and planning for their futures.

A Scout merit badge helped us educate our sons during a summer trip to Yosemite. But that was one conversation, and we all know that to learn and really comprehend something you have to either hear it over and over, or experience it for yourself.

My youngest is starting to think about work and what he might due to earn money while he’s still in high school. After talking about places he might like to work, the conversation turned to how frequently you get paid. That started a conversation we haven’t had in a while. Our oldest is an hourly worker and gets paid weekly. My husband and I have different pay schedules (bi-weekly and monthly). The kids were very interested in the salaried jobs (you get the same amount of money whether you work 40 hours or 60?!?), and overtime (they like the thought of more $$$). It was an unexpected conversation but a good and needed one. Knowledge is power, right?

How are you teaching your child about earning, saving, and planning for their future?

The Planner

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Who plans family vacations or activities in your family?

In my family, it’s me. A bit of wanting to have some control over accommodations we stay in, or how close the campsite is to the showers, how early or late we’ll arrive, etc. gives me peace of mind. My husband is happy to turn this over to me.

Our oldest is thinking thru his next steps after high school. We’ve asked him to do some college visits, as an option to pursue. We’ve done two visits so far and asked him to do a third. Because of the timing, my husband and son will be doing this next trip. While I’m normally the planner and would figure things out, I turned it over to my husband since I won’t be on the trip.

He started scheduling visits — my son and he decided since they’d be on the road, they may as well see additional schools. He thought he had it wrapped up, and then learned one school visit conflicted with another and had to start scheduling the visits again. This went over for nearly an hour. I knew my husband was getting frustrated, but was working hard to keep his cool while I was there because he knows I deal with similar situations each time we travel. I feel like he had a greater appreciation for what us planners go through to pull off a successful trip after finally figuring out their schedule. 😊

I’ve relinquished my responsibilities for planning this trip, and while it puts me outside my comfort zone, because, oh how I want to jump in and just get everything figured out, I know my husband is capable, and it’s good for my son to see his dad taking the reigns. My son may be the planner in his future family, who knows, but seeing his father do it (successfully) shows him what’s possible.

Who plans trips or activities in your family? How are you teaching (or showing) your child what goes into the planning?

I’ll be away for some summer fun with the family, before school starts, and will be back later in the month.

Talk to Me

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Do you ever struggle to get your child to talk to you?

My oldest doesn’t divulge information easily. As his parent it can be deflating (is there something I can do differently to get him to open up?), and sometimes concerning (what is he thinking, is he okay?) but that’s the worrier in me. He is a teen, and I’m aware of his growing need for independence and not necessarily having mom or dad be ‘in the know’ on everything.

My oldest is getting closer to graduating and needs to start thinking about colleges. He hasn’t been willing to discuss where he might want to go, or study. While I was probably the same way at his age (in not knowing what I might study), I always had my eye on going to college. I knew I needed good grades to get in, I’d need to apply for scholarships to help offset the cost, but knew one way or another I was going. I’m not picking up that vibe from my son and that is worrying me.

I can understand the value of a college education being questioned after COVID, but I still believe college is that unique place and time in your life where you get to figure out who you are, what you’re interested in, you get exposed to different people from different places, and your universe expands. I know I thought I knew everything I needed to know about life and others in high school, but saw how small my universe was when I went to college. I very much want that for my two boys. My husband and I have been saving and planning for this.

My oldest shared with my husband he might opt to go to a trade school instead of college. He told this to my husband in confidence and my husband encouraged him to tell me. He won’t do it. I have tried asking him his thoughts on college, does he want to do something different, and he won’t share anything. Ugh! It’s unclear whether he doesn’t want to hear my thoughts (scared of how I might react), or if he’s still making up his mind (maybe college is still on the table?). I just wish he’d talk to me.

It would be one thing if we couldn’t afford it (and I’m aware of how fortunate we are to do this), or didn’t stress the importance of education and gaining knowledge with our kids, but we do. My son is anxious by nature and has a fear of failure (who doesn’t, right?), I’m worried he is taking a path that will essentially guarantee him a job, but narrow his opportunities in the long run. He is becoming an adult, but his frontal cortex still isn’t fully formed and I’m worried about him making decisions that can be life impacting. I may sound dramatic, but it feels like my son is coming to a crossroads and may pick a path different than I envisioned or hoped. I am struggling between supporting him and his growing independence and greatly wanting to influence his decision. I just wish he’d talk to me. It. Is. So. Hard.

How do you get your child to open up?

Can’t Wait

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What have you been looking forward to doing post pandemic? Have you done it yet?

Our family has been planning and saving for a ‘dream’ trip for a while. The pandemic took away a few summers for us to do this vacation due to restrictions or challenging logistics. It’s been hard to bide our time, but the trip is upon us and we can’t wait.

We have two-three summers with all of us together before my oldest is out of the house and our chances of taking a family trip significantly dwindle. Time is moving forward with or without the pandemic. 😬 It makes this trip that much sweeter.

The best part about this vacation isn’t so much where we’re going but how we’ll get there. My youngest, with his love of maps and transit has helped determine how we’ll get from place to place. It’s fun to see his passion and knowledge pour out of him. When he was younger and with his grandparents at an amusement park they were trying to determine which way they needed to go to get on a ride. My son replied to his grandparents, “We don’t need no stinking map, I know where we are and how to get there.” And he did. He’s earned the nickname “I don’t need no stinking maps” from his grandparents, but it’s only used when having a map would be handy. 😊

Seeing our kids get involved in the planning has been fun. Our youngest is excited, but also a bit bummed knowing he can’t see everything in one trip. We remind him to figure out how he can get back to these locations for further exploration in the future. Set a goal, make it happen.

It’s fun to anticipate an upcoming event. Then it happens and before you know it it’s over. I’m going to be mindful, and work to keep my family mindful so we take it all in, and be there, with the goal of this dream trip lasting beyond the vacation itself. Hoping to have experiences that we’ll remember happily forever.😎

What are you looking forward to doing as a family this summer? What memories are you hoping to make?

I’ll be off for the next few weeks and back mid-August.

Spring Chicken

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What are your favorite Easter traditions?

I love everything about Easter: the time of year, the colors and blooms; Easter Egg hunts; family time and all that goes with the holiday. What’s funny is that Easter really did spring (or should I say sneak?) up on me this year. With a work schedule that has been abnormally busy, plus traveling, plus working through a bad cold, I noticed I almost let Easter get away from me. Half the joy, in my opinion, is the planning and getting ready for the day.

I may no longer be a Spring chicken, but I feel like a kid at heart. And while I won’t actually hunt the eggs myself on Easter, I sure will enjoy hiding them and watching the kids find them. It’s joy and happiness that comes from being together–I don’t think that gets old at any age.

How are you taping into your inner-child this Easter season? What helps keep you a Spring chicken?