Anyone else worried about letting your older teen housesit while you’re out of town?

Our oldest decided to forego joining us on a family trip so he could work and make money. We respected his decision though we’re bummed he wouldn’t be joining us. My husband and I agreed him staying behind, watching the house, and caring for our family pet would be a good opportunity for him to be on his own with responsibilities and no one to pick up the slack for him.

There were two things I was concerned about — us coming back to the house being dirty (because we have been unsuccessful getting our son to clean to the standards we do), and a lesser one to him having a party and not so much what he would do, but people that might come over and what they would do. My fear may have been heightened from a recent viewing of the play Mean Girls that my youngest participated in. There is a scene in the play (which is based on the movie) of a house party where the kids sing, “Whose house is it? It’s my house now! Who house is it? It’s my house now!” Funny for the play. Terrifying for the parent whose older child, who will be watching the house, is sitting next to them. 😬 The song had him smiling from ear-to-ear.

Before we left for our trip, we went over things he needed to stay on top of and discussed having friends over being fine, but a party not being okay. He talked about the risks of partying (people getting hurt, property destroyed, etc.). We tried not to lay it on too thick, but present him with facts in the hopes he’d make choices he felt good about.

We checked in with him daily. We could tell he had mixed feelings (as did we) about not being with us. Enjoying being on his own with no one to answer to (at least in the moment) and missing us (even if it was only just a tiny bit). Towards the end of our trip, our son shared how he was growing bored on his own, and feeling a bit lonely. We encouraged him to reach out to friends, or busy himself with things around the house, or just get outside for a walk or a run to break-up the day. We shared with him the growth he was experiencing and how this adjustment time was good for him to figure out how to spend his time and not waste or worry it away.

It was great to return and find no party occurred (or there was a heck of a cleaning job), but the dirt (though not as extensive as I feared) was there. Phew! Our son proved our trust in us, and more importantly in himself. Now, if I could just get that song out of my head.

Anyone else let their teen housesit? What stories or insights can you share?